if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Randomize
