You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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