Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome) http://tfl.nu/u3lw
  Replies (7) Good night (573) Bad night (2033)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home http://tfl.nu/42nr
  Replies (59) Good night (2615) Bad night (513)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her. http://tfl.nu/z3i9
  Replies (141) Good night (878) Bad night (2834)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night. http://tfl.nu/k6rq
  Replies (32) Good night (4329) Bad night (820)
• Favorite

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (606): There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992. http://tfl.nu/3pqb
  Replies (17) Good night (820) Bad night (3398)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts. http://tfl.nu/8v61
  Replies (16) Good night (875) Bad night (6256)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns http://tfl.nu/xc39
  Replies (10) Good night (5072) Bad night (1793)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea http://tfl.nu/d42k
  Replies (18) Good night (5730) Bad night (980)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff. http://tfl.nu/e8i1
  Replies (13) Good night (2571) Bad night (983)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury http://tfl.nu/pv7s
  Replies (3) Good night (560) Bad night (1080)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (864): I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide. http://tfl.nu/p1xg
  Replies (7) Good night (1004) Bad night (364)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  The second I see you we're shot gunning beers

  (1-315): View more from New York

  It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning

  (315): View more from New York

  And your point is?

  (1-315): View more from New York

  Marry me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): The second I see you we're shot gunning beers (1-315): It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning (315): And your point is? (1-315): Marry me http://tfl.nu/zcdd
  Replies (2) Good night (1424) Bad night (377)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick http://tfl.nu/pr7p
  Replies (6) Good night (280) Bad night (381)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird? http://tfl.nu/lwsg
  Replies (1) Good night (394) Bad night (341)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself http://tfl.nu/1rx8
  Replies (1) Good night (372) Bad night (649)

Randomize