Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(423): View more from Tennessee

2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place

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(423) 2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place http://tfl.nu/hlr5

Replies (4) Good night (3405) Bad night (1016)
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(540): View more from Virginia

Whore.

(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I was being facetious

(540): View more from Virginia

Don't try to hide behind big words.

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(540): Whore. (832): I was being facetious (540): Don't try to hide behind big words. http://tfl.nu/w180

Replies (2) Good night (2185) Bad night (712)
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(917): View more from New York City

i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!

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(917): i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see! http://tfl.nu/gbe5

Replies (7) Good night (4711) Bad night (653)
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(252): View more from North Carolina

I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone

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(252): I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone http://tfl.nu/p73u

Replies (43) Good night (1050) Bad night (6893)
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(864): View more from South Carolina

A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!

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(864): A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier! http://tfl.nu/9qgj

Replies (107) Good night (2015) Bad night (5759)
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(303): View more from Colorado

his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy

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(303): his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy http://tfl.nu/u5b8

Replies (51) Good night (8431) Bad night (1713)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.

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(609): This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn. http://tfl.nu/9axz

Replies (30) Good night (7308) Bad night (1261)
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(315): View more from New York

I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?

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(315): I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here? http://tfl.nu/pgo7

Replies (8) Good night (1098) Bad night (3073)
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(613): View more from Ontario

Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.

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(613): Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome. http://tfl.nu/65yv

Replies (15) Good night (4972) Bad night (1168)
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(501): View more from Arkansas

Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.

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(501): Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago. http://tfl.nu/csbb

Replies (6) Good night (1256) Bad night (418)
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.

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(814): The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends. http://tfl.nu/0kea

Replies (1) Good night (731) Bad night (479)
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(818): View more from California

It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.

(440): View more from Ohio

It's important to play to your strengths.

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(818): It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014. (440): It's important to play to your strengths. http://tfl.nu/uc6m

Replies (0) Good night (712) Bad night (453)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest

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(201): I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest http://tfl.nu/yr20

Replies (0) Good night (379) Bad night (267)
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(517): View more from Michigan

I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.

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(517): I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive. http://tfl.nu/2l27

Replies (0) Good night (725) Bad night (275)
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(949): View more from California

There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.

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(949): There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain. http://tfl.nu/am0u

Replies (0) Good night (492) Bad night (210)

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