Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
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