i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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