JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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