UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I can't turn off my feet"
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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