Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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