Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
