I didn't shave. On purpose
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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