not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
