you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize