i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
