your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
