roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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