idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize