guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Randomize
