Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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