Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize