You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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