Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
