He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
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