he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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