Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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