I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Randomize
