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• (650): View more from California

  Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  Howd you meet this guy?

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.

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• (903): View more from Texas

  Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.

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• (323): View more from California

  He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.

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• (607): View more from New York

  Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.

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• (310): View more from California

  I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  Omg I joined a choir last night...

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.

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