That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
