im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
how does that bad decision feel?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
