That's intense
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
