I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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