STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
