But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
my shit smells like andre
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
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