There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
