I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
