I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Randomize
