I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
That accounts for only three of the penises
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
