Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz

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  (310): if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz http://tfl.nu/fhxu
  Replies (9) Good night (3875) Bad night (1547)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Gross. gingers suck

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  (313): Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you (248): Gross. gingers suck http://tfl.nu/yt8q
  Replies (18) Good night (1302) Bad night (1928)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.

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  (571): So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder. http://tfl.nu/3ets
  Replies (278) Good night (4776) Bad night (69429)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex

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  (703): the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex http://tfl.nu/ydbw
  Replies (31) Good night (5377) Bad night (781)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.

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  (256): Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay. http://tfl.nu/5ucl
  Replies (27) Good night (1547) Bad night (5025)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?

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  (401): I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple? http://tfl.nu/ri0o
  Replies (2) Good night (2065) Bad night (1488)
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL

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  (859): IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL http://tfl.nu/qlmv
  Replies (4) Good night (3069) Bad night (989)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.

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  (817): Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass. http://tfl.nu/wbhi
  Replies (18) Good night (3696) Bad night (1006)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.

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  (206): Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional. http://tfl.nu/t1vf
  Replies (10) Good night (2760) Bad night (672)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.

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  (601): You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion. http://tfl.nu/8mpu
  Replies (10) Good night (2371) Bad night (948)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat

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  (310): This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat http://tfl.nu/hcj2
  Replies (1) Good night (909) Bad night (662)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.

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  (314): That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu. http://tfl.nu/ssef
  Replies (7) Good night (812) Bad night (549)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today

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  (304): Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today http://tfl.nu/ckz3
  Replies (0) Good night (226) Bad night (407)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am

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  (727): Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am http://tfl.nu/hlxu
  Replies (1) Good night (468) Bad night (168)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.

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  (812): I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity. http://tfl.nu/zstm
  Replies (5) Good night (229) Bad night (145)

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