I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
