i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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