I smell stomach acid.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
