I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize