I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
