i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
