"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
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