you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
