Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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