I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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