Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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