you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
