I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
