I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
