i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
